Day 14

So I am 2 weeks into this thing. Things I knew before I started: 1)I use the TV as a babysitter in my house.  I do this to get things accomplished when I don’t want so much “help” with the task at hand. 2)I use the TV and internet as an escape from my life. I like to watch TV or jump online to see what is going on in everyone else’s (fictional characters, celebrities, or real people I actually know)life, so that I don’t have to think about what is going on in mine.   I am not proud of these things, but these are things that I already knew about myself, this month has just made it blaringly obvious how often I did it.  I hope to make a permanent change when this month is over (though I am not saying I am giving up TV or the internet- it will just be re-evaluated how it is treated).

I am also far enough into this month that I don’t just want to turn the TV on every time these things occur, I am just aware of “this is a time I would totally choose to do ____.” But I made a new, and sad discovery about my media habits today.  I use it to actually avoid parental responsibilities/duties.  When Landen came down for the 437^th time to let me know the girls were in his room… again…. I found myself thinking, “this is a time I would tell everyone to sit down and watch something, simply so they don’t bug me”. It wasn’t because I was doing something important or that couldn’t be stopped, just the simple annoyance of dealing with the same situation over, and over, and over again. It really broke my heart.  God says in Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. He doesn’t say Instruct him until you get annoyed and then turn on Electric Company and feel good about yourself because you chose and educational program.  Parenting is by FAR the hardest gig I have ever done.  It is completely exhausting, tedious, trying, and sometimes it is just no fun (I know it is not all bad people, I am trying to make a point here). BUT… God has entrusted me with these 4 little people to raise and teach them what they need to know. I only get 18 short years per kid to accomplish this task. The task of showing them the Lord and what He expects from them.  To teach them that He loves them no matter what, and to show them all the wonderful things that are in His book. To teach them how to get along with others, function in society, personal hygiene (especially the boys), to read, organization, to be creative, that not everyone will want to be your friend… and that is ok, to be kind and treat others with respect, responsibilities, to save and not always spend, plan ahead, have fun, laugh at yourself… not at others and to make healthy lifestyle choices (among many other things). It is a HUGE responsibility that I sometimes take for granted. So this month has been very convicting and eye opening thus far. Can’t wait to see what God has in store.

Note: Just in case you were wondering… we have only had 1… yes 1, day in the last 14 that the weather was nice enough I could just let the kids play outside. It has been a cold, rainy, muddy March. I’m just sayin’! ;)