Food: Day 2

Today was better. I went into it with a better attitude, so I think that helps. I also went to the store and bought dry roasted nuts (per the recommendation of many people that have done this and did not starve to death), so I finally felt full in between meals today.

Grocery store discoveries today… there is added sugar (and a bunch of other stuff that most the time you can’t even pronounce) in soooo many things! It is hard to find things that are already made that do not contain a bunch of filler stuff. Which lead me to another discovery- healthy, good for you food is expensive and work.  I’m not saying it is not worth it, I am just saying that making everything from scratch takes a lot of time and prep. If you attempt to buy things premade and healthy, you pay the price. $10 jar of almond butter (instead of $3.48 for JIF) and I don’t even like it… literally gagged. Some things I will just do without this month. :)

Today after school Eleni asked if they could have an ice cream cone for a snack. Landen quickly reminded her that we were giving it up for the month. She started to pout about it, and then quickly turned it into, “I can eat the cone, right?” there was no rule about giving up cones, so she enjoyed her ice cream cone and her blue berries. This led into a small sad moment tonight when looking at the school menu to discover that they were having pizza a school tomorrow. (Curse you school lunch for having pizza during the fast!!!) Eleni started crying at the thought of not getting to eat it when everyone else does and I am starting to doubt my thoughts on bringing them into this fast. I don’t want them to hate it, or have bad feelings towards God or fasting because it is miserable, but I do think they can learn something. What is too much at a young age? I just don’t know. So I pray that tomorrow doesn’t go too poorly, and it is overridden by something amazing I pack in her lunch (not sure what that will be yet, but I am sure it will be amazing :)).

Another disturbing thing I discovered about myself today is how much I rely on food to bring me happiness or reward myself (or my children for that matter). When trying to think of a reward for good behavior, it is always something like… family out for ice cream, someone gets to choose where we go out to eat, you get a special dessert or special treat. I reward my children and myself way too much with junk! So I am on a mission to find a better reward system… things that make me happy that do not involve food (sadly this will take a lot of effort). 

This is a challenging journey… thanks for joining me on it!

Food: Day 1

Holy Moly! This is going to be a long month. I am not sure if it is the fact that I was up all night with a kid with an earache, my husband is out of town on Father’s Day, or the lack of sugar… but a very emotional, cranky, really wants a cupcake monster was awakened at my house today around 2:30pm.  I am so tired and crabby… my poor children. 

Here are the problems I discovered today - I did not prepare well.  Don’t get me wrong, I did my research and know the things I can eat and not eat, and went shopping so I have many of those things in my house. BUT- Last week was a busy week for our family and I did not make the time to plan out meals. I have in my head things that will work together, but I need to do a little more research on options.

Second problem- I have WAY too much stuff in my house that I CAN’T have… that is such a temptation. I was feeding my children a leftover pasta dish for lunch and I seriously wanted to cheat. I know that is sad merely 12 hours in, but I wanted a bite so bad!

Third problem- I am having a hard time feeling full. I ate a TON of fruits and veggies today, but it wasn’t until I prepared myself a meal tonight (that included meat) that I felt full. Even then, 3 hours later I am hungry. :( I need to find some recipes for fulfilling meals. Pinterest might get a good long visit tomorrow.

All the food I ate today I enjoyed. It was delicious. I just find myself wanting those things I can’t have, regardless of how good the things in front of me are. Aren’t we like that with so many things in our lives? Always longing for something we don’t have, even if what is in front of us is absolutely wonderful.  It’s like Abraham Lincoln said, “We can complain because the rose bushes have thorns, or we can rejoice because the thorn bushes have roses.”  It’s all on how we choose to look at it. 

So I am going to try to have a better attitude tomorrow. My prayer is that I am thankful for the wonderful things God has provided, and stop wishing I had something else.

Thanks for joining me on the journey!

Food Month

Purpose: To be thankful and respectful of the natural food God has given.

5 Things I will be giving up:

1.     Added Sugar- real and artificial

2.    Beverages other than water

3.    All dairy

4.    All grains (including corn)

5.    Processed food- specifically things containing carrageenan, MSG or sulfites

This leaves basically fruit, veggies, and lean/non-processed meats.

I am basing this month’s fast around the Whole30 food program. There are a couple of reasons I choose to go this route:

1-    Reading through the program it sounds exactly like what I had envisioned this month to be (minus a few minor things).  It basically has you eating everything natural (directly the way God created it) with out a bunch of stuff added in. And it has you eating the things your body was created to consume. Win-Win!

2-   -This plan is already created and has rules to follow without me making it up. This was a super appealing to have something already lined out with what is cheating and what is not. Much easier on my part as far as creating the boundaries goes… and like they say “if it’s not broke, don’t fix it.”

3- There is support and resources available. Aside from the people doing this program with me during the month (council member Missy and my dear friend Kariann) there are tons of people out there in the lovely internet world (and some local friends too) that have been there, done that, and survived it. They can give tips and encouragement… and we all can use a little bit of that!

If you want to check it out, here is the website I am using:http://whole9life.com/2012/08/the-whole30-program/

I am going to be super honest…this month TERRIFIES me!!! I know that good things will come of it, it always does. But I love cheese, I love bread, I super duper love sugar. I know there are lots of things out there that are good for me that are delicious, and I am counting on those things this month, but I will miss those processed, tasty, convenient foods.

My fears/dreads for the month:

1.     Eating out- I might become an unsocial recluse because I am afraid of making a wrong food choice at a restaurant.

2.    Special occasions- I know there are going to be birthday parties, baby showers, field trips and such I have during food month and the likelihood of being able to eat the yummy food available isn’t super great.

3.    Vacation- our vacation is the last 12 days of the fast… I seriously do not even want to think about this.

4.    Staying focused on the purpose-I don’t want to become side tracked by the possibility of loosing a few pounds or inches during the month. Though I wouldn’t complain if it happened… it is not the purpose.

My family is semi-participating in this month. My children have decided to give up pizza and ice cream for the entire duration of the month (sadly we eat these things almost once a week). Eric hasn’t decided if he is whole heartedly participating yet, but the kids and I are working on him. :) They will also be eating Whole30 approved dinners, because I am not fixing 2 meals every night. I might fix something extra like pasta or corn or bread with their meal that I won’t eat, but for the majority of the evening meals they will be eating like me. 

I ate so horrible today in preparation for this month that I am welcoming the whole foods with open arms. The kids and I went to SnoBiz this afternoon and ordered pizza for dinner as a last hurrah before the fast.

I know so many of you already eat this way and this may seem like a breeze to you… but I expect it to be a challenge. Any encouragement from the “other side” where the grass is greener is much appreciated and very much welcomed. One of my favorite things it said on the website was this:

Don’t you dare tell us this is hard. Quitting heroin is hard. Beating cancer is hard. Drinking your coffee black. Is. Not. Hard.

Though I don’t drink coffee, the point was taken loud and clear. There are so many things in life that are more difficult than eating the wonderful food God has supplied us with. So I am trying to go into this fast with that mind set.  Someone please remind me of this 3 days from now when I am a monster and crying for a Diet Vanilla Coke from Sonic. :)

This should be a very interesting month.

Thanks for joining me on the journey!!!

Clothing: Day 26

Only 2 more days!!! This has been an interesting month, much harder than I thought it would be. I also learned some great things… but none of which I thought I “should” be learning going into this month.  God has a great way of doing that.

I FINALLY got to go on a date with my husband (it has been 3 months) and I sported the ever famous Psalm 138:14 shirt and a pair of jeans (that I have worn it about 47 times- slight exaggeration). He made mention that there was just something about that outfit that does it for him. :) I appreciate him being a good sport throughout the month. He never once complained about seeing the same thing day in and day out.

Date night!

I would say this month has taught me a lot of things… and by day 26 I would say 99% of the time, I am not really caring about what people think about my clothing. But I did have a moment this week… It was Monday and I was wearing my long striped dress. I went to pick kids up from summer school and someone made mention of how cute my dress was.

Sidebar: I kind of struggled with telling people or not telling people about this month’s fast. Obviously anyone that would read the blog or close friends knows I am doing it, but I don’t want it to become a “look what I am doing” kind of thing. I want to make sure that I keep the focus on what the reason is for doing each month’s fast. It becomes a fine line for me to say “here is what I am doing and how God is changing my life” and “look what I am doing”.  I try to find opportunities to talk about it, but I really struggle with how much, if any, to talk about it with people unless they bring it up.

Back to the situation: So the lady commented on my dress in a lobby full of parents picking up their kids.  A couple other moms commented how it was cute, asked where I got it, things like that. Two days later, when I was in the same dress as I was on Monday ( I have also worn this dress multiple times a week the previous 3 weeks to pick up kids)… I purposely avoided the lobby! I waited until most parents left before I went in to pick up my kids because I was afraid someone would notice I was in the same “cute dress”. I’m not sure if it is pride issue or a vanity issue, but I was disappointed with my reaction none the less. It really hasn’t bothered me all month long, but once someone pointed out something I was wearing.... it all the sudden became an insecurity again. I can’t believe even at the end of this month, I still struggle with little things like that. 

The striped dress.

I guess I still have a lot for God to teach me in these areas. And that is one of the wonderful things about this process… there is so much to learn. Things you didn’t know you struggled with, God will show you. Things He wants your heart to be softened towards, He will find a way. I am having a love/hate relationship with this fast. I LOVE what I am learning but I HATE some of the things I have to do to learn them. I think the thing I am loving the most thus far is the doors it is opening… mostly with relationships. Friends or family that will read something and then send me a note or a message or phone call on how they can relate, they have the same struggles, or they are inspired in some way to make a small change.  Some are people I haven’t spoken to in years, and some of them are people I am going through life with right now, and had NO idea they shared the same struggles.  It is really encouraging beyond words to know that I am not alone. I’m so thank you for people reaching out. It is more appreciated than you know.

I got to stand in that “cute dress” in the rain through a ballgame that night. Cold, rain, and sundress do not go well together. And since I got home and had no clean clothes to change into… I got to sit in that wet dress until it was dry. I think I have enough clothes to last the next 2 days… and I managed to only have to sit in a sheet/towel 3 times the entire month to do laundry. :)

Random cute pic of my adorable running partner.

It has been a great month of learning… but I will be glad when Sunday arrives and there is a week break from fasting. :) 

Thanks for joining me on the journey.