Satan's Roadblocks

Here is something I have learned during this fast... when you commit things to the Lord, Satan attacks. Satan does not want you to succeed, so he finds an area of weakness and pounces. I really struggle with focusing on myself. I have this false guilt, that I think most women have, that everyone else comes first.  And though I do feel I was put here to serve the Lord and meet the needs of others, I don't think there is anything wrong... it's actually probably really good for me... to take a step back every now and then to see how I am doing.

Since I started the "me" fasting 10 days ago... you know the one that focuses on taking care of myself physically, spiritually and emotionally... well Satan has thrown a few roadblocks to make it more difficult than originally thought.

I have had 4 of my 5 children sick and a traveling husband. This makes it a tad difficult to focus on me. Very few things are getting accomplished to the extent I was hoping at this point, but I am trucking along. Here's where I stand:

Study/Journal my way through the book of James-  This one is actually going fairly well. I have made a bit of time each day to spend sometime in the Word. It has been great. I'm taking my time, but just about finished with James, so I will be moving on to another book when I'm done. I've enjoyed it.

Keep Prayer/Gratitude Journal- This one has been eye opening. I have seasons of struggling with one child more than others. Looking back through my daily prayers actually written out makes it blaring obvious where I am struggling and what I am abundantly grateful for. I am also really enjoying that some of the kids are really getting into it.

Read a book for entertainment purposes- nothing. I have done zero for this... haven't even looked at options so I am open for suggestions. Nothing self help... only for enjoyment.

Take a trip with Eric- This is planned, booked and paid for.8 more days!!! I am soooo excited and ridiculously nervous about leaving the kids.

Take a day trip myself- I have in mind the things I would like to do, but this one has been increasingly tricky to get scheduled. Eric's work schedule has been brutal, which makes my finding a day alone difficult.

Brain in a Binder- This is something I lived by when all my kids were little, but have gotten away from it the past several years. Now that I have a baby at home again, I have found that I need to have that structure again. I have managed to re-organize and revise it to fit my current situation. I am very loosely using it this week and hoping to be more stringent starting next week.

Create something- I have a project in mind and a day set aside next week.

Learn a new piece on my trumpet- not sure this will be done by the end of the month, but I'll be working toward it. I'm actually pretty excited.  After hours of listening to trumpet pieces and reaching out to the band teacher for some guidance I've settle on a piece and it is ordered. It has been a LONG time since I have prepared a musical piece.

Beth Moore Study through church- I missed the first week with sick kids. The next Sunday, Eric was home and offered to stay with sick kids so I could go. I would normally say no (feeling it was my responsibility to stay home) but I let him. I really enjoyed the study and am looking forward to the weeks to come.

Brush, Floss, face washed and vitamins every night- this is the only one I have accomplished EVERY day. Even the night I fell asleep on the couch, I got up and did my nightly routine.

80oz of water a day- fail. 64 is my go to number. I have had a hard time doing this very simple thing.

Train and run a half marathon- This one had an * next to it. Cat's out of the bag... so the * comes because I am 13 weeks pregnant, so I am playing this by ear. I don't want to push too much, but I would like to push a little. Between sick kids, traveling husband, all the rain... I have only got one run in. Doesn't seem to promising, but I would like to keep on trying.

I'm tired. Satan really doesn't want me to accomplish goals this month. I could use some prayer and motivation.

Thanks for joining me on the journey.