Satan's Roadblocks

Here is something I have learned during this fast... when you commit things to the Lord, Satan attacks. Satan does not want you to succeed, so he finds an area of weakness and pounces. I really struggle with focusing on myself. I have this false guilt, that I think most women have, that everyone else comes first.  And though I do feel I was put here to serve the Lord and meet the needs of others, I don't think there is anything wrong... it's actually probably really good for me... to take a step back every now and then to see how I am doing.

Since I started the "me" fasting 10 days ago... you know the one that focuses on taking care of myself physically, spiritually and emotionally... well Satan has thrown a few roadblocks to make it more difficult than originally thought.

I have had 4 of my 5 children sick and a traveling husband. This makes it a tad difficult to focus on me. Very few things are getting accomplished to the extent I was hoping at this point, but I am trucking along. Here's where I stand:

Study/Journal my way through the book of James-  This one is actually going fairly well. I have made a bit of time each day to spend sometime in the Word. It has been great. I'm taking my time, but just about finished with James, so I will be moving on to another book when I'm done. I've enjoyed it.

Keep Prayer/Gratitude Journal- This one has been eye opening. I have seasons of struggling with one child more than others. Looking back through my daily prayers actually written out makes it blaring obvious where I am struggling and what I am abundantly grateful for. I am also really enjoying that some of the kids are really getting into it.

Read a book for entertainment purposes- nothing. I have done zero for this... haven't even looked at options so I am open for suggestions. Nothing self help... only for enjoyment.

Take a trip with Eric- This is planned, booked and paid for.8 more days!!! I am soooo excited and ridiculously nervous about leaving the kids.

Take a day trip myself- I have in mind the things I would like to do, but this one has been increasingly tricky to get scheduled. Eric's work schedule has been brutal, which makes my finding a day alone difficult.

Brain in a Binder- This is something I lived by when all my kids were little, but have gotten away from it the past several years. Now that I have a baby at home again, I have found that I need to have that structure again. I have managed to re-organize and revise it to fit my current situation. I am very loosely using it this week and hoping to be more stringent starting next week.

Create something- I have a project in mind and a day set aside next week.

Learn a new piece on my trumpet- not sure this will be done by the end of the month, but I'll be working toward it. I'm actually pretty excited.  After hours of listening to trumpet pieces and reaching out to the band teacher for some guidance I've settle on a piece and it is ordered. It has been a LONG time since I have prepared a musical piece.

Beth Moore Study through church- I missed the first week with sick kids. The next Sunday, Eric was home and offered to stay with sick kids so I could go. I would normally say no (feeling it was my responsibility to stay home) but I let him. I really enjoyed the study and am looking forward to the weeks to come.

Brush, Floss, face washed and vitamins every night- this is the only one I have accomplished EVERY day. Even the night I fell asleep on the couch, I got up and did my nightly routine.

80oz of water a day- fail. 64 is my go to number. I have had a hard time doing this very simple thing.

Train and run a half marathon- This one had an * next to it. Cat's out of the bag... so the * comes because I am 13 weeks pregnant, so I am playing this by ear. I don't want to push too much, but I would like to push a little. Between sick kids, traveling husband, all the rain... I have only got one run in. Doesn't seem to promising, but I would like to keep on trying.

I'm tired. Satan really doesn't want me to accomplish goals this month. I could use some prayer and motivation.

Thanks for joining me on the journey.

Me Month

So... I took a little break from blogging. I've still been fasting and keeping notes and taking pictures, but life has been busy and I have been focusing on the fasting part and not the blogging part. :)

The last two months were waste month and media month... I hope to catch y'all up on how those went and what I learned, but I'm going to jump in where I am and hope you can learn something right along with me this month.

This is Me Month. Sounds kind of like an oxymoron with fasting so let me explain a little...

Purpose: To focus on my spiritual, emotional and physical health.

This is something I struggle with. I think a lot of women struggle with this. We get busy with everything that needs to be done for all the people around us that depend on us, and we kind of push ourselves to the back burner. This month I am giving myself permission to focus on how I am doing spiritually, emotionally, and physically... and is what I am doing in those areas glorifying God?

This month is a little different that previous months. I'm not really setting guidelines or rules to follow, more of a list of things that I would like to accomplish/focus on in each of these areas of my life. Some of them are one time things, some are daily, some are goal oriented. I prayed a lot about these things. Honestly when I started more than 6 months ago, I had in mind what this month was going to look like, and... well... life changes and the Lord shows you things you didn't know you needed to know and gives you things you didn't know you needed. So here we are 6 months later with a very different looking list than originally thought. :)

So, without further ado... here's my list for the month:

1. Study/journal my way through the book of James.
2. Keep a gratitude/prayer journal for the month (everyone in my family is participating in this and keeping their own journals this month)
3. Read a book for entertainment purposes.
4. Take a kid-free/work-free trip with Eric
5. Take a day trip for myself
6. Revise, organize and utilize my Brain in a Binder
7. Create something (and not for a birthday party)
8. Learn a new piece on my trumpet
9. Beth Moore Bible Study through church
10. Brush, floss, face washing routine, and vitamins EVERY night (even if I fall asleep on the couch)
11. 80oz (at least) of water daily
12. Train and run a half marathon*

My solemn prayer for this month is that, even though this fast is a "me" fast... I want the focus to remain on the Lord. I pray that focus stays on how He has blessed me and the gifts He has given to me, and I do not turn it into an excuse to be selfish or self-centered.

I hope to take you through some of these that might need a bit more explanation as we go along and keep you up with my tasks as we head through the month. I'm excited and a bit nervous... focusing on myself tends to make me uncomfortable and shut down. Praying I keep the focus on the Lord and all goes smoothly (as smooth as fasting can be ;) ).

Thanks for joining me on the journey!