I am far
enough removed from the year of fasting that I can look back and reflect with
perspective. I know I said it a million times during the process… but it truly
was the most difficult and most amazing year.
When my
journey ended I received a couple of things that help me with the daily
reminder of the journey that I have been through and the journey I am on. I received
a beautiful journey necklace that never comes off my neck. This is a daily
reminder when I look in the mirror and see the reflection, or when I am doing
jumping jacks and it is pounding up and down on my chest, or one of my children
is sitting in my lap playing with it dangling around my neck… life is a
journey, every part of it. No matter what part of life I am thoroughly enjoying
or what part I am struggling through… it is a journey and I am on it.
I also received the awesome gift of my entire
journey (all the blog posts and pictures from beginning to end) in a hard back
book. I have read through it twice… cover to cover. The first time there were
lots of tears. It truly was one of the most difficult years of my life. But when I read through it again, it was read
with such a heart of gratitude and thanksgiving. I learned so much about myself during that
year. I have a deeper, closer, more personal relationship with the Lord than I ever
dreamed possible because of the crazy notion to fast 9 areas of my life… I had
no idea what was in store.
I have had
several people ask me if I would do it again, or if I would recommend someone
else to do it. That is such a hard question to answer. I think fasting should
come with a warning label that reads like this: SATAN IS ABOUT TO ATTACK YOU
HARDCORE!!! JESUS WILL GET YOU THROUGH… BUT HANG ON FOR DEAR LIFE!!! I think if
I knew how hard the year was going to be, how much Satan was going to attack
during the process… I would have never started. During the 10 months of fasting
I went through some stuff! Along with all the normal challenges of life that
come with being a wife, mother, and woman… I had a brain tumor come and go and
come again, I had friendships fade away, I lost a baby, I lost my grandpa, I
doubted who I was and what God wanted me to be, and I learned a lot of painful truths about
myself.
But I can honestly
say (5 months later) that I am glad I weathered the storm, because the reward
was so very, very sweet. I did learn so
many things about myself last year. And yes, some of them were difficult to
hear/learn, but I am a better person for it. God did some amazing works through
this fasting process, not only with me but all sorts of people in my life. I
got to learn about the areas that have strong holds in my life, and how God
will get me through anything! I got to know my kids and husband on an entirely
differently level… and that is something that I can’t even put into words how grateful
I am to have experienced. I got to run a marathon, I made new friends and
deepened some amazing friendships, I had opportunities to share the love of
Jesus… opportunities that were always there and I never even knew it. I was
blessed to hear some AMAZING Christian speakers and meet my inspiration for the
fast, Jen Hatmaker. I got to watch my
son accept Jesus as his Lord and Savior and take him on in baptism. I got to
watch my family grow and blossom in a way I didn’t know was possible. And I got
to watch 4 little people with $50 and a HUGE dream build a fresh water well to
supply drinking water for an entire village in Africa in 7 short weeks.
There are so many blessings I received from
the process… I am so glad I didn’t know the struggle it would take to get
through it, because I don’t know that I would have trusted the Lord enough to
get me through it. And I guess that I what I take away from this. I can trust the
Lord has a plan. No matter the storm or struggle I am in, He has a plan and it
is the right one… so I will trust Him.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you
and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
I am not a
blogger. I am just a girl on a journey. Just like all of you out there… we are
all on our own journey. And now that I have completed (and even repeated some)
of the fasting journey, there is always a new journey to be had. My next
journey starts in just a few short hours when the moving truck shows up at my
door. I know God has a plan, and even though I don’t know what it is, and right
now I really don’t like it, I trust Him fully.
So here it goes
… Thanks for joining me on the journey!
